"Sandy"

 

 

 

"Life is not so much about counting your days as it is making your days count..."

Byron "Sandy" Sanderson sat down in his favorite chair after coming back from lunch in the dining hall. "Bunch of old fools", he thought. "Nobody can hear anymore, and there is nothing interesting to talk about. Just sit and shovel it in, no matter what is served."

Sandy moved into his assisted living apartment about six months ago. It was a big change for him. He had lived in his house for over fifty years, and it was finally time to let it go. What really sealed the deal was when he tripped and fell on the last step coming into the living room. He was very fortunate he did not break anything, but still he could not get up by himself. He fell close to the small table where he kept the living room phone. He called his son, Roger at work and soon help was on the way.

When Roger arrived, he insisted on taking Sandy to the doctor to get checked out. Sandy grumbled about it, but agreed to go. He hated doctors. Rich, overpaid prima donnas. When they arrived at the doctor's office, Sandy was able to go right in. Some bumps and bruises, but nothing broken or sprained. The doctor was so sure of this, he did not even order any x-rays.

When the exam was almost over, the doctor wanted to sit down with Sandy and Roger and talk about the fall. "Mr. Sanderson, you were very lucky this time. I see by your chart you just turned 90. Overall your health is good for a man of your age, but you have been diagnosed with some slight Parkinson's as well as some dementia. Both of these diseases will get worse for you every year. Because you are still living in your own house, this is going to put you at a greater risk of injury or worse. Have you ever considered moving into senior housing or assisted living?"

Sandy looked at the doctor with a shocked expression. "No offense Doc - that is for old folks. Hell, I was a union pipe fitter until 65, and I am still in better shape than most." The doctor smiled, as he loved the fact some older folks that still had spunk. "Mr. Sanderson, I really hope you live to be a hundred or older, and stay in good health. However, the statistics speak for themselves - the odds are against you. The next fall could be a game changer. If you broke your hip or a femur, you would spend the rest of your life in a nursing home."

As Roger was driving his dad home, he looked over at Sandy and said, "He is right Dad. You were lucky. Molly and I would feel a lot better about your safety if we helped you sell your house and you move into someplace safer with services you might need in the future."

As the weeks went by, Sandy did start to become more comfortable with the idea of moving. After his wife had died, the house seemed very empty. His son still lived in the area, but his daughter lived on the West Coast and did not come home very often. Too many problems of her own to think about her dad. His son however, was a different story. Good paying job, nice wife, well mannered kids. They would come and pick him up most every Sunday to join the family in dinner. Never a religious man, once in a while they would even drag him to church with them.

The day finally came where the house was sold and Sandy moved into a newer assisted living facility not that far from Roger's house. Most of Sandy's furniture was sold in a consignment store, as he did not need much in his new place. Once the sale was complete, Sandy was amazed at how much money he had in the bank. With social security and his union pensions, the rent he paid for the services he needed was more than covered by what was coming in every month. Here he was, 90 years old, in good health, and almost a half million dollars in the bank!

One Sunday when Roger came to pick up his dad, the subject of money came up. Roger knew that his dad was "fixed for life". Years ago, he had talked his mom and dad into getting some long term care insurance. Should he ever need to go into an expensive full care facility, the costs will be covered by his insurance and his monthly income. In addition, when Roger's mom and dad turned 70, they both pre-paid their funerals. In other words, Sandy did not have a financial worry in the world. A boat load of money, and nothing to spend it on.

When they were about half way to Roger's house, Roger got the courage up to ask his dad the hard question. "Dad, what are you going to do with your money. Please don't tell me again you are saving it for your old age, because I think you are there. Besides, as I have told you many times, my sister and I don't need it." Sandy did not understand Roger when he talked like this. After all, it was money that made the world go round. He worked hard for his pension, and he deserved everything that he has right now!

"Well Roger, you and your sister are going to get in when I die. I expect you to let it grow and then pass it down to your kids when the time is right." As Roger was pulling up the driveway, he looked over at his father. "Dad, one of the things you taught me was good money management. We are doing fine. My sister is doing even better as her husband's law practice is doing very well. The kids will be fine. I am passing on to them the good money management skills you taught me. I will give them the same legacy you have given me."

"Molly taught me something different though Dad. She taught me the joy of giving. When we first got married, she would tell me the first third of our lives were for learning, the next third was for earning, and the last third was for giving back. We both made a vow to each other that we would not only enjoy our money, but also experience the joy of giving some to the needy. As we have been blessed, we want to bless others. When we die, we want to die broke. Come in with nothing, go out with nothing."

Sandy looked at Roger in stunned silence. What in the world had gotten into these young people? Give your money away? Were they mad? It saddened Sandy to think some of his hard earned wealth might eventually be "given away". To who? Some bum?  Who did not want to work? "Roger, if you and Molly want to do something foolish with your money, fine. I am keeping mine right in the bank. Every day it grows a little bit more. If everybody in the world practiced the same money management I did, well, the world would be a much better place." With that the conversation ended and they both got out of the car.

The weeks went by. A special Sunday was coming up at Roger's church. It was mission Sunday, and this year the focus again was on the country of Sudan.  A young woman from that region was coming to speak at Roger's church. Her village had been helped by a generous donation the church had send there two years ago. The village managed to scrape up enough donations for a representative of the tribe to come to America and thank Roger's church, as well as two othe churches who made the donations possible.

The woman who was going to speak was named is Abeo, which in African means "I bring joy". She was chosen from her village as her English was very good. She also had a compelling story to tell her friends in America. The travel plans were made, the dates were set, and she was going to be at Roger's church this next Sunday.

Sunday came and Roger picked up his dad for church. It was always a struggle to get him to church - it was ever since Roger was a boy. Sandy did not like church - a home for the pious. Most churches he had visited had been more like "clubs" than anything else - and they were boring. He really had no time for them. But is was important to Roger, so he agreed to go. Get if over with, go back to the house and have some of that delicious roast that only Molly knew how to make.

The church service started with the usual mumbo jumbo type of liturgy that Sandy had never understood nor gotten into. Then the pastor would get up and tell everyone how bad they had been the past week. However this time when the pastor got up, he told the congregation they had a very special guest this morning. A guest from the village in the Sudan this congregation helped support last year. With no more fanfare, the pastor introduced Abeo as their guest speaker.

She stood in front of the church with only the microphone in her hands. No notes, no anything - just the microphone. "I bring you glad tidings from my village. My name is Abeo and I am so happy to be here today. I may be one, but I speak for many. I come here today, in the name of our almighty God, to thank you for what you have done to help us."

Sandy looked at his watch. "This was a huge mistake." he thought. "What was I thinking? This is going to take forever, and I can hardly understand her. Why is she here? Who paid for this trip, and how much did it cost?" Sandy had no interest what so ever in what this person had to say this morning.

Abeo continued to speak. "Many in this country do not know how many lives are saved by generous gifts given by people just like you. Two years ago, this church along with two others, sent a relief agency in Africa over $15,000 to dig a deep well. My village had never had pure clean water before then. Our water was often times bad, full of diseases. Every day in Africa over 4,000 people die from lack of food or clean water. In my family alone, my younger sister became sick with diphtheria five years ago and died. My older brother got typhus and almost died. He was sick for weeks."

The church became very still and quiet as Abeo continued to speak. "When I was a little girl, Christian missionaries came to live in our village for a while. They taught us about God. They gave us hope through Jesus. One of the things we learned about was the importance of helping others. In Matthew Chapter 25 we learned the lesson of the sheep and the goats. We learned how God views the importance of helping others. My favorite part of that chapter is where it says, The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ "

Abeo continued, "In my village, we believe God's words in this story to be true. As you have blessed our village with life giving clean water, we are blessing the village next to ours by sharing as much as we can. However, one well is not enough to supply clean water to our village as well as the ones that surround us. With the help of God, we will try. The week before I left, a three year old boy in a village in the hills nearby died from a disease he got from their bad water. Our village decided to stretch our water to share with that village also."

"I will conclude my talk to you by just saying one thing. My village has seen the heart of God through your generous gift to us. We will never forget it. The legacy of giving life saving water to our village will last for many years. Thank you again and may God bless you all!"

The congregation stood up and applauded. There were not many dry eyes in the entire building. The pastor then gave the message and the service was over. Once in the car, Sandy was strangely silent. He looked over at Roger and asked a very simple question - "Is what she said true? Are people really dying from no clean drinking water? In this day of age?" This was an important moment, so Roger did not start the car. "Dad, before we sent money to that village in the Sudan, we looked at many different sources of information. We did our homework. Yes, it is that bad. Thousands of people die each and every day from starvation or bad water. And yes, many of those are children."

"Our church wished they could have given more, but the $15,000 we helped raise was a good start. One deep well supplying water to one village is a very good start. Maybe next year our church can get together with other churches and raise some more money for another village."

Sandy just sat there, saying nothing, looking out the window. His mind was racing however. "Kids dying" he thought. "Today? That is not right! This can not be!" He turned and looked at Roger, "I have money. I can help. I can't sit in my room looking at my bank statements when kids are dying from no food or clean water. I just can't!"

In the back seat, a smile started to spread across Molly's face. In her heart, she knew what she was witnessing. Through this woman from Africa, speaking at a church service in a town in America, God was changing a heart. She was hearing things come from Sandy's mouth she had never heard him say before.

Sandy continued, "Roger, whatever agency your church used to help that village, I want you to contact them next week. Then I want you to go to my bank and withdraw $150,000. You tell that agency to dig ten new wells in the villages in the Sudan who need it the most. Tell them if this works for them, hell, I mean heck, we might even do it again the next year!"

Roger started the car and they drove back home so everyone could enjoy Molly's fine roast dinner. Sandy could not stop talking about this woman from Africa. About her courage. About her heart. There was a joy in Sandy that Roger and Molly had not seen for many years, maybe ever. It was the joy of giving.

Roger did take out the $150,000 and ten new wells were dug in Africa. Countless lives were saved because of it. Sandy lived long enough have Roger do it again the following year. When Sandy died at the age of 92, Roger and his sister had a very simple thing put on his grave marker.

Byron "Sandy" Sanderson

Born December 1, 1921

Died December 21, 2013

Husband, Father, Grandfather
Loving and generous to all