Honor amongst friends?

 

 

 

"I know there is no honor amongst thieves - but friends? There should be!"

This past weekend while my wife and I were witnessing the birth of our grandson, a fairly large "dust up" happened on social media. It went from mild to very testy in a short period of time. Hurtful things were said. There was even some name calling. Was this between hard core conservatives and progressives? Nope. This was between people who should be on the same side of the fence.

Before I continue, let me digress for a minute. Many years ago while employed at a large company in Bloomington, I received a huge break in my career. A man I worked with, whom I really respected for his ability, made a fatal mistake with a customer. He let a negotiation get personal. The negotiation quickly devolved into name calling then even some threats. The next day, this very talented man was yanked off the program and the position was offered to me. My boss told me, "This customer can be very abrasive, sometimes a real jerk. But we need this account. Don't take the bait. When in doubt, kill him with kindness."

Wise counsel from a wise man. That was my mantra for the rest of my working days. Listen better, talk less, learn more. Now back to the social media "dust up". It all centered around a radio interview with my congressman over his vote for Speaker of the House. Many people weighed in on this issue. I know some, I know of some others. I know our congressman. All are good people. All are on the same side. The vote my congressman took for Speaker can be discussed from a pros and cons perspective. Nobody needs to be thrown under the bus. Nobody needs to have their character impugned. Honor amongst friends can and should rule the day.

I have said this before and I will say it again. We will not win the next election unless 1) we can win over people from the middle as well as the other side and 2) we stop "means testing" and practicing fratricide on each other. As Ronald Reagan always said, "we can disagree without being disagreeable." Our side continues to have the right ideas. We know the right course for our country. We will never get the other side to see the light if we call them stupid. If we call our own people traitors. If we name call anybody. And if we don't practice honor.

If anyone thinks this is a call for all of us to become RINOs or to reach across the aisle to surrender principles, it is NOT. Someone asked me a while ago why I did not attend more conservative meetings. I have in the past, and they are fine gatherings of like-minded people. But I am tired of preaching to the choir. The battlefield of ideas lies in the street.
It is the other side we need to win over. The other side always comes out strong in a presidential year. Before 2016, we need to show a united front. Articulate our message. Convince (in non-derogatory ways) the other side they are WRONG, DEAD WRONG.

Most of us when kids heard this from our parents - "You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar." When talking to people on our side, or the other side, first be nice. Being respectful and listening does not mean you lay down and surrender. The ballot box is always the final arbiter, whether it be in a primary or a general election. We need to keep our eyes on the prize and be smart in how we get there.