"Our days of future past might soon be in the past. What do we know? There is no time like the present to take care of what might be a problem for our kids in the future."
My parents were married for 66 mostly happy years and lived in the same house for 50 of those years. Both my parents passed in their 90's - my Dad when he just turned 90, and my Mom just shy of 97. Part of the World War II generation, I did not believe my Dad would ever think he would die. Worked until 70, and then consulted for six months after that. When at 89 he found a lump on his throat, the bad news came in fast and furious.
A life long cigar chewer (not smoker - chewer), this bad habit finally caught up with him. Throat cancer. The last year of his life was a lot of me taking him over to radiation treatments, and then basically taking care of their house as well as ours. By the way - I was still working at this time. My parents were not equipped for this. Neither was I. Not in the least.
Even though my folks had made me their Power of Attorney and Executor decades ago, they had never shown me their "keys to the kingdom". In other words, where stuff was in case one of them should pass. So shortly before Dad passed, he and I had the "dining room conversion". It was my first glimpse in all my years at their financials.
Not bad. They were far from rich, but did a good job in managing their money. However, it was not in the super organized fashion I was used to. No problem - I could adapt to it if necessary and then change it. But then my Dad took a quick turn for the worse, went into hospice, and died. I promised him as he lie on his hospice bed, that I would take care of Mom - and I did for the next ten years.
Why do I tell this story? Both my wife learned quite a bit about the "stuff" which needs to be taken care of before we leave. I was able to take care of Mom only because of the time and a half my wife and I both worked in doing so. The getting rid of their house and their stuff - was a huge mess.
Our good friends who recently moved to Florida did an awesome job of downsizing. They taught us quite a bit. How to become "minimalists". Very smart thing to do.
I am reminded of that old saying, "Live for today, yet plan for tomorrow". Even if the tomorrow does not include you. Our papers are drawn up, our funerals planned and paid for, and our "keys to the kingdom" book is up to date and tucked away where either one our daughters can get to it.
My preference, of course, would be that we stick around for the same amount of time (or longer) that our folks did. We have grand kids to help raise! But statistics are statistics. Bad stuff can happen at our age, and happen quickly.
Our days of future past might soon be in the past. What do we know? There is no time like the present to take care of what might be a problem for our kids in the future.
After burying parents and one adult son, we also realized it was time to get our sh.. together also.
ReplyDeleteFinances on spread sheet, who to notify, etc.
Also funeral obituaries, service requests, songs etc.
Just filling out paperwork for burial at Fort Snelling.
You can pre-arrange now on OMB form 2900-0784
The only issue is our wishes change as we move around, get older and closer to the time.
Preparation will help the folks left behind deal with issue with less stress.